Monday, December 31, 2007

Fun Monday #46: the funny joke edition

Peter is our host with the most this week. He is a funny guy ... and wants us to laugh our way into 2008. Here is his mission for us:

I want you to tell us your favorite joke and/or show us your favorite cartoon, don’t worry if there is some duplication that just means more than one person found it funny. So come on and regale us with your best joke and/or cartoon, remember its New Years Eve and we feel like a good laugh, before 2008 comes along and does its thing on us.

Well, well, well (a deep subject).

I'm a funny gal too, but if you ask me to come up with a joke, I freeze up like a broken Frigidaire. (And I'm showing my age, too.) So I'm going to see what everyone else thinks is funny by visiting all the Fun Monday folks today.

Anyway, there is a family joke that we tell over and over again. I don't know how FUNNY it is, but it amuses us.

A duck walked into a bar and asked the bartender: "Got any grapes?" (except for reasons I can't explain we always say "gwapes" ... adds to the humor? Or not.)


A duck walked into a bar and asked the bartender: "Got any grapes?"

The bartender said, "No." And the duck left.

The next day, the duck walked into the bar and asked the bartender: "Got any grapes?"

The bartender gave the duck a dirty look, but answered: "No." And the duck left.

The next day, the duck walked into the bar and asked the bartender: "Got any grapes?"

The bartender leaned over the bar and hollered: "Every day you come in here asking for grapes. Every day I tell you NO, we don't have any grapes. What is it with you anyway? If you come in here once more, I'm going to nail your beak to this bar!!!!"

The duck apologized and left the bar.

The next day, the duck came into the bar and asked the bartender: "Got any nails?"

The bartender looked at the duck and said, "No."

"Good," said the duck. "Got any grapes?"

You're welcome.


Alison said...

Ha!! Made me laugh, actually is was more like a guffaw!!

AnGlOpHiLe FoOtBaLl FaNaTiC said...

That's my kinda duck, J!

And, I'm so with you. When I found out there was a FM this week, Who knew??, I freezed up like that kid who was triple dog dared to stick his tongue to the pole.

melodyann said...

My favorite joke that NO ONE in my family gets is: An old man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc, you gotta help me, I can't pee!" The doc says, "How old are you, sir?" The guy says, "I'm 96!" The doc says, "Haven't you peed enough?"

hahahahahahahahahaha, I slay me!!

Hootin' Anni said...


But wait, I gotta ask: Just how can a broken frigidaire freeze up?

- - -
Did you know why the Nativity Scene cannot be displayed in D.C.? Because no one can find 3 wise men OR a virgin!!!!

Mine's posted! Come laugh with me today!!!

kitten said...

That is so sweet!

mjd said...

Verry Funny Janet..."got in any nails" perfect. If ducks could talk, I am sure that they would say "gwapes." Just listen to Donald Duck.

Have a Happy New Year

Lil Mouse said...

we say 'got any corn' -- instead of gwapes... but the same thing applies. giggle.

ChrisB said...

LOL I enjoy this one even though I have heard it before.

Mama Drama Jenny, the Bloggess said...


Kaycie said...

That's pretty cute.

Tiggerlane said...

One I've never heard before! That's hysterical! One I actually might remember how to tell!

Sandy said...

Laughed out loud, I did! Thanks - got any grapes?

The Rotten Correspondent said...

That was funny! I had a lot of trouble with this FM topic. It's hard to come up with something that can capture a sense of your own personal humor in one shot.


Robinella said...

That is funny! Crazy duck.

Junebug said...

I had heard that one before but I never can remember all of a joke, I could hear it over and over and it's still funny.

Linda said...

You made me snort my pre-New Years Eve party drink out my nose! I love those ...a ____ walks into a bar jokes! Thanks for visiting my blog, and for the birthday wishes! This is a fun blog, I'll be back!

Peter said...

Janet, there is nothing wrong with your family's sense of humor.... that was FUNNY, thanks.

Jenni said...

Yeah, I didn't feel up to the challenge this week. I laugh a lot and my family makes up all kinds of crazy jokes and carries on like you wouldn't believe, but I don't consider myself particularly funny. I can't tell a joke to anyone outside of my husband and kids and usually the "jokes" we tell around here are puns or plays off something someone has said or we've seen or heard. I don't know if anyone else would get us. As far as the best jokes I've heard from other people? Same freeze up there. I can't remember when *asked*.

We do have one running gag around here. My mom is extremely grossed out by a certain scene in Monty Python's "Meaning of Life". Ever since high school, my brother and I have made references to it whenever possible because we love to see her reaction. When we go over to her house for our New Year's Day dinner today, someone is bound to say "Put it in a bucket" and "It's only a tiny, wafer-thin after dinner mint." Once I even topped a birthday cake with fake barf (rubber from the novelty store) and covered the outside with Ande's mints for my brother's birthday because I knew she would freak out and my brother would laugh hysterically.

Karly said...

Very amusing. :)

I freeze when someone asks me for a joke as well. Although I did horrify my husband with a joke the other day. Shall I tell it? Okay, but remember you asked for it.

What gets louder as it gets smaller?

A baby in a trash compactor.

HA! I know. Its horrible. I don't remember where I saw it, but it was SO horrible that I had to giggle a little. I'm bad.

alisonwonderland said...

that's a cute joke! (and you told it very well!)

happy new year!

lisa's chaos said...

I always giggle at that duck joke! So funny, sounds like something my kids would say!

monkeysandmarbles said...

ha! i love that joke...i'm rotflmao over here!

nikki said...

hahahhaha, oh that's so bad.

Kaytabug said...

LOL that was funny!!
Have a Happy New Year!!

~JJ! said...

HA! I laugh.

My favorite is:
A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?"

Cracks me up every time.

Canadian flake said...

lmao that joke is funny...I am still giggling

thanks for the chuckles...

Jo Beaufoix said...

Hee hee.
I love it.
And 'gwapes' sonds a bit Daffy Duck.

Pamela said...

I am so behind on Fun Monday posts.
My brother told a peach pie joke that was sort of like this. I always laughed but never got it. (:

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