Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Post-birthday stress disorder

Yup. I don't know what is wrong with me today, but I am totally in a funk.

Could it be that I am suffering from the aftermath of having dinner with my children again?

Could it be that I'm worn out from holiday cheer?

Could it be that I am just freakin' old?

Hmmph. I dunno. I just know that my butt is draggin' on the ground today.

And dinner? My children?




There are times I am afraid to write about them because I really am concerned that Child Protective Services will come a-knockin' and take my Roo-girl away from this ... ahem ... strange crew and their clearly out-of-her-mind mother.

But I just can't stay away from a story that involves roasted ears of corn, butter and nasty boys.

Birthday dinner was at a local barbecue place that I am particularly fond of. In fact, leftovers are awaiting this very minute! Mmmmmmmm.

The Drama King had a full ear of corn. He took a foil-wrapped pat of butter, opened the foil ... and proceeded to rhythmically rub it on the cob.

His older brother promptly fell on the floor. Then that same older brother carefully pulled back the remaining husk on his ear of corn and began to systematically gnaw on it.

"Oh, really," the Drama King snorted. "Don't you think you should buy it dinner first?"

I don't think I can ever ever ever look at an ear of corn again.

Nor can I go back to that restaurant after spewing barbecue sauce out of my nose.


melodyann said...

ya know, just the addition of me renie and hopie, would ensure that the family would have a fine old time. Or that the authorities would remove the roo from the home, one or the other.....

~JJ! said...

You should know by NOW that you can't sit adolescent/grown up boys at a dinner table without them being 'dirty'....that's the fun.

nikki said...

I can never look at corn the same way again. What do your kids say about bananas?


dawn224 said...

nice :) I just made a "love in a sock" reference today... oh boys :)

AnGlOpHiLe FoOtBaLl FaNaTiC said...

Boys! I hope your funk is only temporary. Have all 9 candles been lit? Cause at least you have pressys ready to open.

Jenni said...

LOL! That sounds a lot like dinner at our house. Or any waking moment at our house. How can you be in a funk with funny kids like that? Cheer up woman!

Robinella said...

HA-larious!! I guess I have that to look forward to. Not that I don't already hear p3nis 100 times a day now. Sheesh. Poor Roo-girl. What doesn't kill her will make her stronger, right?!

jennifer said...

Ah yes, dirty minds! Happy belated birthday!

Jennifer, Le Binky Bitch

Canadian flake said...

omggg wayyyyyyy too funny....I think I would have choked with laughter...lmao.

Renée said...

Heh. I'm so old that I remember blaming those down days on biorhythms!

How about this for a hoot: Free Biorhythm Chart

Since that's all bullshit, remember that you have friends and family that love you and cheer up. :-)

The Empty Nest Blog
Sharing laughter, experiences, and resources for fellow parents of college students.

Tink said...

You know, I don't think it's your family. I think it's just guys in general. Last night Hoop turned everything I said into something dirty. Including, "I really want gum." WTH?


My older two boys are the same way, get them together with my husband..forget about it...they try and outdo one another in embarassing me....

Karmyn R said...

Is this what I have to look forward to? HAha

Al_Pal said...


Really, it could be worse.



Scribbit said...

Takes me back to the times when I used to buy corn at roadside stands when I was pregnant with my first child. Oh that fresh corn!

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