Friday, August 31, 2007

The view from here

Of course here is not really HERE. I mean, like here is not home. Here is still faraway collegeland where I am learning to let go and the Z-man is learning to fly.
Last night he and I had an evening of parallel play as we snoided the free wifi together in the hotel lobby. It was such a bonding experience.

We moved him into his dorm today, which was fun if you like traipsing up to the fifth floor (ok, yeah, they had an elevator ... but only ONE and it was slow and scary).

There is more of course. The sights, sounds and smells of a new place are overwhelming. And there are so many stories crowding my brain. For example:

* Electrical storms are cool -- unless you're caught outside in one. At home, lightning looks like flashes of light in the sky. In faraway collegeland, there are ACTUAL BOLTS that you can see touch down. (Yeah, I know ... I'm a dork and very very sheltered.)

* We got off the plane and had to take this cool train thingy to baggage claim. It was pretty crowded and everyone was standing. The guy in front of us was in a suit and chatting away on a cell phone. The picture of sophistication... until he farted. The elderly lady to our left snapped to attention, looked at us, shook her head and grimaced. The train car was ... shall we say ... toxic.

* Super Targets have EVERYTHING. Unless you are looking for a fan. Then they don't.

* We had our first experience at a Sonic. Mmmmmm... cherry limeade. Why didn't someone stop me before my first hit? Now I have to go home and leave that yumminess behind.

* When I went to college (back when dinosaurs roamed the earth), dorm food SUCKED. I seriously have memories of creamed chip beef on toast, and then there was mystery meat. But you ain't seen nothin' till you've seen dorm food at a culinary school. There was REAL meat. Eggs. Vegetable fritatta (seriously). Sandwiches you could grill like a panini. Salad bar. Fresh fruit.

* The killer was when we were bussing our lunch trays and walked by the condiment rack. Dudes. They have A-1 sauce in there. Seriously.

* My kid is probably the only college student ever who NEEDS to gain the freshman 15.

* Tonight, he is sleeping in the dorm (where there is NO air conditioning) and I am sleeping in a hotel (where there IS). It feels so empty in my room.

I have one more day here. I didn't really need to. But I did.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

In a state of ... oh I don't know

Here I am in faraway collegeland.

It was a long day of flying and landing and flying and landing. (Gotta love indirect flights.)

And who knew that renting a car (one that had been reserved in advance, just for the record) could take an HOUR OF STANDING IN LINE. Argh. But it has been a lovely day with my man-child. He has become quite a remarkable person.

Tomorrow I help him move into his dorm. And then he doesn't need me there anymore.

That baby-bird-flying-from-the-nest thing sure hurts bad when you're the one left in the nest.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Hello, you must be going

To my third-born on his 18th birthday

Oh my goodness. Where did the time go?

How is it possible that you, my wise little boy, are now a man?

Wasn’t it only yesterday that you sneaked into a quartet rehearsal, picked up an Oreo off the cookie plate, put it in your mouth and hummed? We all looked at you in amazement.

“It’s my pitch pipe, mama!” you said, all indignant that we didn’t get it.

(You can see the resemblance, can’t you? He was 2 at the time)

We still laugh about it. My chorus buddies think it’s the funniest story ever.

I think you kinda had to be there. But whatever… This is about YOU YOU YOU, my Rocketman, the Z-boy, sometimes (but not recently) known as Dr. Z and currently the one and only Chef Z.

In a mere two days, you and I take off for faraway college-land, where you will stay, and I will leave; where you will learn to be a real chef and run a restaurant and everything. This is the first time you will really have gone away from home. There haven’t been many sleep-away camp experiences, and even when it came to the every-other-weekend thing with your dad, your brothers went – and mostly you stayed with me.

You were the one who was always here. And now you will not be.

Eighteen years ago, they pulled you from my exposed insides (c-section no. 2) and placed you on my chest. You looked up at me with those big blue eyes – and I was lost forever. The eyes have turned more of a gray now, but they still gaze at me with the same intensity that they did all those years ago.

I burst with pride at your accomplishment, and yet I mourn intensely the loss of my wide-eyed, bespectacled little boy with the ginormous vocabulary.

You joined your sister and me on the great shopping debacle on Sunday, and we talked over a crepe lunch about "the boy who never left." The idea that you WILL leave amazes and terrifies me.

Who will harmonize with me in temple? Who will take over the kitchen when I look pathetic and useless? Who will be the other half of the comedy team of Jay-Zee? Who will live in sloth at the top of the stairs? (Oh wait, the sloth part? THAT I won't miss. Well, maybe a little.)

Fly, my little bird. Fly from the nest. But remember always who loves you best.

All my love aways,

Monday, August 27, 2007

Water, water everywhere...

Except at our house.

There's nothing like the feeling of NO WATER. Ugh. Seriously.

One of our neighbors, in the process of moving out at 1 a.m. (oh please don't ask), knocked into the main water pipe thingy into our other neighbor's house and caused a gusher. The only way to fix something like that ... is ... to call the fire department and have them TURN OFF THE WATER MAIN AT THE STREET.

Oh, sorry. Was I shouting?

Yeah, well, we didn't have water until 4 p.m. today. I went to work armed (heh) with extra deodorant. I was thisclose to having to go to the gas station to pee and taking the kids with me to the gym to get a shower.

But now, we are once again flush.

Sunday, August 26, 2007

The shopping gene

I dont have it. Pure and simple.

But the Roo-girl? Has her own AND the one I didn't get.

This child can shop from early morning till late at night and never miss a beat. If I hadn't been there when she was born, I SWEAR I wouldn't believe she was mine.

So today, I am a waste of a human being. Kohl's and DSW, and THEN the mall: Two trips into Abercrombie (three if you count Abercrombie kids, too). Victoria's Secret (Vicki's, as I like to call her. We're becoming best buds. See here for an explanation of things that come from Vicki's). Target (yes, she will agree to Target but not for anything "stylish" like clothes). Aeropostale (omg). Forever 21. There was more, but my poor, sad brain is too mushed to remember.

To be fair, she was, for the most part, spending her own money. The loot from a very successful bat mitzvah (successful both in her accomplishments AND her gift haul). And it always cracks me up to watch her bargain-shop when she knows it comes out of her own pocket. All of a sudden, the clearance tables look reeeeeeeeeal good.

She shopped so hard that even SHE was tired of it and ready to go home.

My feet hurt.

And maybe my head too.

Shopping. ugh.

Saturday, August 25, 2007

Yay me!

Hey, I'm a big girl now. Come see me at Karly's house!

Monday, August 20, 2007

OK, no lows

There is finally joy in Mudville.

Not only was she stellar as she entered Jewish "adulthood," but she rocked the house at her party. She was gracious, she was gorgeous (can I say that about my baby?), she showed off her cheer/tumbling skills, she danced, she did it all.

All signs of the trauma of the afternoon before were gone gone gone.

All that was left was this:


(Yeah, ok, I'm very lame. I'll be damned if I can figure out how to flip this stupid picture right side up. Kinda blows all the dramatic tension, huh? Sigh.)

Saturday, August 18, 2007

Highs and lows

Have I ever told you how much middle-school-aged kids just SUCK?

The Roo-girl's bat mitzvah service was this morning and she ROCKED ... totally blew everyone away at her expertise, poise and abilities. I was the proudest mommy EVER, and she had a grin that went from one side of the country to the other.

And then.... and then....

She went to a party for one of her friends, who had his bar mitzvah on the same day. She was so excited to go. She had picked out the perfect outfit. She had a perfectly matched bag and headband. Her excitement level was high.

And two hours later, I got a phone call. "Can you pick me up now?"

"Oh, is it over?"

"No, I just want to go home."

Why, you might ask?

Because there were only a handful of kids she knew and those kids declined to "hang out" with her (whatever that means).

So we have a mopey Roo now. Totally killed her high.


Tomorrow is party time, though. Her friends. Her world. We can hope for the best.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Nothing ventured ... nothing said

Well, well, well. So I started a blog and then promptly avoided posting like the plague.

Hmmmm... Writer's block? Time issues? Feelings of creative inadequacy? (See, um, like, yeah, I read all the biggies from BlogHer -- I'd list them, but I am too new at this to do linky love.) All of the above?

Maybe just "sophomore slump."

My freshman offering was soooo exciting that I, er, couldn't figure out how to follow it. (Sure.)

Maybe I just have NOTHING TO SAY!

Don't know why that would be. Gawd knows my life is a busy nightmare these days.

Exhibit A: Double workload at the job. (And NOT double pay. In fact, I just got a raise ... 90 cents an hour. 90 cents! Couldn't it have been a nice rounded-up buck? Guess not.)

Exhibit B: Bat mitzvah. Yes, my youngest child comes of age on Saturday. Religious services Friday night and Saturday morning. And then Sunday -- PARTEEEEE. Leaves me a few things to deal with, ya know? Like book a caterer and dj, out-of-town guests, kids who don't RSVP, the usual.

Exhibit C: Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water, the young lady of exhibit B ripped her arm open on a countertop and needed seven stitches in her arm! Very attractive blue stitches do NOT match her dress.

Exhibit D: Son going to college ... 1,000 miles away. The kid who never went to sleepaway camp, who never really spent any time away from home, who didn't spend every other weekend with his father until he was 8 (and we separated when he was 6 months old!). My baby boy. Leaving. Aug. 30. See ya. Noooooooooooooooooo.

Exhibit E: Sheesh, people! Isn't this enough for one person to bear? Do i NEED an exhibit E?

What I NEED is a stiff drink. Maybe two.
All Rights Reserved. Planet of Janet, 2010.