Tuesday, April 8, 2008

Is this the party to whom I am speaking?

The Roo-girl spent the weekend with her BFF Susie (name changed, of course).

It was makeup playdate because Susie and other BFF Laurie (also name changed) went to Mexico over spring break and -- oops -- forgot to ask Roo to come along until they were halfway through the vacation.

Um, yeah.


Anyway, she was there all weekend (I was out of town too, so it was perfect for everyone). And apparently Susie was tired of the voicemail message on Roo's cellphone.

I will admit it WAS annoying. It had been recorded three years ago at a cheer practice by someone other than Roo. The noise was incredible and the message in monotone: "Hi, this is Roo-girl's cellphone. Leave a message."

On Monday morning, little miss Roo bounded into my room to ask for a peanut-butter-and-banana sandwich (lefthanded knifework is still iffy here) and also demanded (oh yes, demanded!) that I listen to her new voicemail message.

It goes like this:

The Roo-girl: Hi. Um. I can't come to the phone right now, so leave a message and I'll call you back.

Susie (muffled in the background but still audible): That's horrible.

TRG: I know. Which one is the pound key again?


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

TRG: You are allowed to come to the honor roll breakfast.

Evil Mother: Oh, thank you, your majesty.

TRG: One condition ...

EM: Only one?

TRG: Yes, no flash photography. In fact, no photography at all.

EM: I can't take pictures??

TRG: NO. Especially with that BIG CLUNKY CAMERA that I got for you.*

EM: Oh for heaven's sake. Everyone takes pictures at the honor roll breakfast.

TRG: Except YOU. Besides you have so many blackmail pictures of me that I'll NEVER be able to leave the house!

EM: Ah, my eeeeevil plan is working!!!!!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

TRG: *waving her casted arm in my face* Mom, can you put my pants on for me?

EM: *struggling to pull her pants leg over her foot* Roo, your pants are too tight.

TRG: Yes, but these are my Abercrombie pants, and unless you are willing to buy me another pair, I am going to wear them ... until ... until I can't wear them anymore.

EM: I guess that'll have to be the way.

TRG: Yeah, can you button my pants?

EM: Yes, and we hope you don't have to pee at school today, because you won't be able to get your pants back up.

TRG: *insert cheesy grin here* I peed already.

EM: Good planning.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

* Yes, indeed she did have a big part in getting my camera by dropping a very unsubtle hint to Wonderhubby at the dinner table. I could have SWORN that I wrote about it, but could. not. find. it. Ah, some day.


Simply Jenn said...

Poor broken Roo! I love the cell message. But seriously, I can put on my own pants and mt thumb and elbow are encasted too. Maybe I need tighter pants, huh?

LceeL said...

Poor Roo. Now might be a good time to consider holding certain favors (Mom, button my pants?) up for ransom. (I will if you STOP ATTACKING MY CAMERA.)

nikki said...

Do you have a camera on your phone?

Janet said...

Yeah, there's definitely some bribe material here.
Re: your post title: my "pink and fluffy" costume in the play I was in reminded everyone of Edith Ann.

Huckdoll said...

At least you don't have a big, clunky, FILM camera! My mom still has her film camera and it's so totally embarrassing :) She just loves printed photos though and it's really hard to explain to her that, yes, you can print digital photos, also.

Old school :)

Burfica said...

I loveeeeeeeeeee the message, hahahahahaha

You know not to make light of what you guys are going through, but that's the way it's supposed to be is us parents helping and taking care of the kids. Even getting them dressed.

And here is why I say that. When I had my big fall in Texas, and was in a cast/brace thing and a broken ankle, bruised up knee. Well...my hubby was still here in az, and sister went back to work, cuz her hubby was being and ass, and "told" her she couldn't take any time off to help me. So...I had to have my 8 year old child help me get my pants up and down to go to the restroom and to help me get dressed and undressed for showers.

My 8 year old son SHOULD NOT have had to do that. I felt so embarrassed and ashamed.

So...there is my thinking. Here is to us pulling up our baby's pants, and making their sandwiches!!! *enter three cheers here*

Karly said...

Oh, go get that poor girl some new Abercrombie jeans! She BROKE HER ARM, MOM! She needs them! Otherwise she's gonna end up with a broken arm AND a bladder infection!

anglophilefootballfanatic said...

BFFs don't sound very BFFish to me if they 4got to invite her??

I hope she doesn't need to pee at school, too. That would be highly unorthodox to ask a friend to pull your pants on and off for you.

The Immoral Matriarch said...

I love you two's relationship. I cannot wait for my girls to grow up.

I'm such a liar. They're too old already.

Joy T. said...

That cell phone message is priceless. And sounds suspiciously like my husband's cell phone message. Let's just say he's incredibly gadget challenged.

Kaytabug said...

So,what kind of camera do you have that is so "Big and Clunky"?

You 2 are just too funny. I know I sound like a broken record, I can't help it!

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