Remember way back in elementary school when you had to do a report on James Garfield, the 20th President of the United States and you told the class all about how he was shot after only four months in office? You also remember that he recovered after a week, but doctor's continued to probe at the healed wound causing complications and resulting in his death almost three months later? Okay, we all knew that about Garfield, but you also remember that James Garfield could write with both hands at one time and in different languages.!!! Why do you remember that? Maybe for you it wasn't James Garfield, but somewhere in your past education, you picked-up some little bit of useless information that you've never forgotten.
What funny trivial fact do you remember that you probably should have forgotten a long time ago?
So, um. Well. See, the thing is, I have Swiss cheese for brains (everything goes out the holes) so I KNOW there are things that I remember that I should have forgotten, but ... um ... well ... I forgot what they were.
So I am going to bend the rules a little. (Hey ... just a LITTLE, ok???)
Instead of trivial facts, I present to you the "I can't remember what I had for dinner last night but I can remember THIS about my life" list:
1) Where I was when President Kennedy was shot: In the sixth grade. They didn't tell us until school was over. No big deal, you think? Well, don't forget that I'm on the West Coast. He died at about 1 p.m. CST -- which made it 11 a.m. by us. We learned our president was dead just before we got out of class at 3:10 p.m. My younger brother saw me across the schoolyard and yelled out, "Did you hear about it?"
2. First thing anyone said to me on the playground when I entered my new school in second grade: "My mother knows your mother and she said to be especially nice to you." That girl became my best friend from second through sixth grade.
3. Most memorable toy: Of course, there were Barbies and other dolls. That's the obvious stuff. But before I had Barbies or any other dolls -- probably when I was still a toddler -- I had a wooden Pinocchio doll. The thing that made it special was it had two noses -- one short and one long. Kinda like these, only smaller.
Drummer Man had one as a child, but it didn't have the interchangeable noses, and after he picked it up to swing it at the Drama King (they were 3 and 6 months -- sibling issues, anyone?), I removed it from his world. Ah, memories.
4. From the top-10 humiliating moments of seventh grade department: My name. It's boring. Well, at least when I was 12, I thought so. (Who knew it could be such a blogging badge of honor?) I wanted to change it, and in the interest of not making DRAMATIC changes, I wanted to just shorten it to "Jan."
In those days, we put our names on our papers last name first in the top righthand corner of the page.
So ... one day, I put Lastname, Jan at the top of my spelling test.
My English teacher was kind of a jerk and was walking around the room peeking at what we were all doing. He stopped short at my desk.
"Jan?" he asked. "JAN????????????"
It was about a 40-syllable word the way he said it. With that TONE.
I never did it again.
Just think. If it hadn't been for Mr. Seventh Grade English Teacher Jerkface, I could have been writing a blog called Jan's Plan.
Go visit the rest of the Fun Monday crowd. I am going to.
If I remember.