I have a recurring dream.
The circumstances are always different, but the underlying theme is always the same.
I'm supposed to be somewhere, and I'm not ready to go, and time is ticking away, and I'm supposed to pack -- or get dressed -- and a deadline looms. And I'm stressing ... and worrying ...
And then I wake up.
Every. single. time.
It's a stress dream, this I know. My version of the "public speaking in your underwear" or "showing up for the final and knowing you have no clue what class you are taking" dreams.
Sometimes I'm in a hotel and I know my plane takes off at 6 a.m. and it's 5:30 and I'm not even packed and ... oops.
Sometimes I'm in a dorm room and I'm leaving college to go home and I haven't packed up my stuff and my plane leaves in an hour and ... oops.
Sometimes I am supposed to be on stage with my chorus and I don't have my makeup and our call time is minutes from now and ... oops.
That was the dream I had the other night. We just came off of competition season for my chorus. In my dream, I knew I had to be onstage in 30 minutes, about 90 miles from home.
And I was still in my bedroom, looking for my mascara.
Somehow, though, I ended up in the auditorium, all dressed and made up, but as I rushed inside, the chorus had already taken the stage. I sat in the audience and sobbed.
And somehow, sitting next to me was my director, even though she actually would have been on stage directing my chorus mates.
In my dream, she put her arm around my shoulders and told me, "It's ok, you missed this one, but it's ok, don't worry."
If that had been real life, she would have ripped me a new orifice in my derriere for missing the performance, but never mind that part.
The important part -- in my opinion -- was this:
The dream was completed. I was late, I missed my deadlines, I was upset and beating myself up, but I didn't die and I was told that "it was ok."
What is different since the last time I had this dream?
I left the newspaper business. I left the stress behind. I found something that makes me happy.
And I brought closure to my recurring nightmare.
Ahhh. Life is good.