Gather 'round, my friends, for I have a tale to tell. Although some of the details you will have to figure out for yourself because it's ... um ... well ... PRIVATE.
The place: Our local grocery store.
The cast: The Evil Mother and the Roo-girl.
The reason: Oops. I can't tell you. You'll have to guess.
The Roo-girl scanned the shelves. So did the Evil Mother.
"Why are there so many??" the Roo-girl snarled. "How do you know what you need?"
The Evil Mother shrugged. "It depends. Let's just pick one."
"The sport kind, then," Roo answered. "Oh, and my friend said they make some *product deleted* for thongs."
"They make them for thongs??" said the Evil Mother, slightly horrified.
"Yes," answered the Roo-girl, still poking at the boxes.
And so they do. And there they were. Right there, albeit slightly hidden, on the top shelf.
Because otherwise, how could a girl have that fresh feeling during ... well ... yeah ... then.
My little girl is a woman.
And now we BOTH need chocolate.