Haiku Friday: the "yeah, I did it!" edition

Now it can be told:
As newspapers go under,
I made my escape.

In less than a week,
I went from unemployed to
signed, sealed, delivered.

I'm learning new skills,
as I start over again.
And I rock the house.

But the best part is
how many people tell me
that I LOOK happy!

"It's taken 10 years
off your face," my friends all say.
Can I hear "WHOOOHOOOOO"?

You say potato, I say ... huh?

We were making dinner together.

I like to do that -- even though the kitchen is quite small and we have to do a little do-si-do around each other when we're both in there together.

That's part of the charm of it, really. Bumping into each other "accidently."

I mean, really, we're approaching our sixth anniversary in April. We're still newlyweds, after all!

Anyway, I was in charge of the fish.

He was in charge of the au gratin potatoes. (From a box, of course. Z-man is the chef. We're just ordinary -- and chronic shortcut-takers.)

Anyway, his potatoes were first since they take 27 to 30 minutes. He mixie-mixie's and got them into the oven. Meanwhile I cleaned up some leftover materials off the counter.

A half-hour later, he pulled them out of the oven.

Weird ... it was still pretty loose. Shouldn't the sauce have thickened up a little?

I poked at it, and it sloshed. He looked at the box again. Yes, 3 1/2 cups of milk and a couple teaspoons of butter.

"Maybe we should put it in the microwave and boil off some of the liquid," he suggested.

Yeah, except it didn't do ANYTHING for it. In fact, it smelled not-right, too. Too buttery and milky.

We scratched our heads and looked at each other.

"Um," I said, suddenly remembering what I had cleared off the counter earlier. "Did you put the cheese mix in there?"

DOH!

Yes, he mixed in the milk, the butter and the potatoes, but forgot the sauce mix.

But the best part ? He looked at me and grinned his goofy "oopsies" grin:

"Blog fodder, huh?"

Bwahahahahahaha.

Yes.

A little lip service

"Why didn't you tell me that J-bear pierced her face?"

Yes, that IS an interesting way to start a conversation, don't you think?

The funny thing is ... the answer I got from Wonderhubby to this question was a stunned "HUH????"

Because he didn't know either.

Apparently, her chin/lower lip (whatever you call it) was pierced at least a month ago.

I actually think it had been at least a month since I had seen J-bear face to face. She goes to school full time, works full time and has karate responsibilities now that she's a black belt. She really isn't around much.

Wonderhubby, on the other hand? Rode in a car with her not long ago -- as a passenger -- giving him ample opportunity to see her profile and the lovely nail-like thing protruding from her face.

But he didn't notice.

Why?

I dunno. Selective vision to go with his selective hearing? Probably. (Hi, honey! I love you!)

I think it just truly didn't enter his consciousness that this was possible and therefore wasn't looking for it and THEREFORE didn't see it.

Me? I did a full-on doubletake. Couldn't miss the damned thing. It all but screamed at me.

Now I know that facial piercings are no big deal these days. Everyone's doing it. Noses, eyebrows, upper lips, lower lips, tongues. Let's not even get INTO the piercings that people can't see when they meet you for the first time.

Whatever. I'm old school. Ears are the extent of my piercing worldview. If you want something pierced, go for it. I just won't do it myself.

(Although at one point, I admit my girlfriend and I had a pact that we were going to pierce our belly buttons the year she turned 40 and I turned 50. That magic moment passed six years ago, and neither of us went through with it. And never will.)

Anyway, a lip piercing seemed out of character for J-bear, and so it rocked me.

On the other hand, considering the tattoo that covers most of her back, I guess maybe I shouldn't have been.

Oh, did I not mention the tattoo before?

Heh. Sorry about that.

Perhaps growing up isn't so hard to do after all

My oldest child had a difficult childhood. He was a rambunctious sort, with no impulse control and the ability to dismantle a room in 30 seconds.

It was with good reason that we referred to him as Mr. Destructo when he was a tot.

(Continued at Mid-Century Modern Moms)

Weekly Winners: February 15-21

First and foremost, I present to you the best photo of the week: yours truly in my new professional attire, as shot by the Roo-girl.

Janet grows up and enters corporate America:

And to answer previous comments on this issue, no, I didn't pick it to match my blog, but doesn't it just rock that it does?

After that, things kinda went downhill. Pretty busy rockin' the new job and all ... so the best I have to offer this week is scenes from a basketball game.

A pretty blurry one at that!

Up and over:


Now you see her -- oh wait, you don't!


Black and white of the black and white:

Go --->here<--- for more weekly winners.

The photographic evidence

You asked for it? You got it.

Me in the infamous blue tweed jacket:

See? Very p.r.o.f.e.s.s.i.o.n.a.l.

Dressing like a grownup

Role reversals are always amusing.

Accordingly, it was hilarious to go shopping with the Roo-girl this past weekend.

Because we were not shopping for her (SHOCK!!!), but for me.

After 29 years of wearing jeans and t-shirts and flipflops, I was in need of "business casual" -- something I am sadly lacking in my closet.

Because, really, I'm a little backwards when it comes to dressing up.

I was the bane of my mother's existence. The most put-together woman ever gave birth to a tomboy who grew up to prefer function over form.

I guess the karma wheel had to swing hard in the other direction when that same tomboy gave birth to the original girlie-girl.

Funny how these things work out, huh?

Anyway, a-shopping we did go -- twice. Once just the two of us (well, Wonderhubby was there too, but he was merely an observer) and then with my friend J and her daughter A, our intrepid shopping partners in crime.

And a complete role reversal it was too.

Because I kinda stood back and let them buzz around the stores and dress me.

Hilarious, really, to watch my daughter plow through racks and pull out possibilities.

Pathetic (and highly reminiscent of my childhood) to have my girlfriend bring pants and tops back to the dressing room while I tried on outfit after outfit.

When all was said and done, I came home with several pairs of pants, some sweaters, a blouse or two and a really nice blue tweed jacket. (The jacket did NOT pass the 14-year-old acceptability test, but J and I liked it and overruled their veto.)

Did I spend too much money? Yep.

Did I have a good time? Sure.

Was it worth it to walk into my daughter's room on Monday morning in my black slacks, white blouse, tweed jacket and heels and have her pronounce me "very professional"?

You betchum.

Smile! You're on Candid Camera (and Mommy's blog)

The Roo-girl had a small digital camera that she carried everywhere with her. You never know when you might want to document a part of your freshman year in high school, ya know ...

It stopped taking pictures at a most inconvenient time (right before cheer nationals and her big trip to Orlando and Mickey's house).

So when we returned, she begged me to take her to Costco so she could buy a new one. She still had Hanukkah money to spend, and, since I'm always willing to NOT spend MY money, I agreed to take her shopping.

(Continued at Mid-Century Modern Moms)

Fun Monday: the what's on your feet edition

It's been forever and then some since I participated in Fun Monday, but this one seemed so ... I don't know ... doable.

Gattina of Writer Cramps is our hostess this week.

She has some sort of foot fetish, I think (heh), because she wants to see what's on our feet:

Please show us what you wear on your feet inside your home! Do you wear slippers, flip flops, shoes or nothing? Just take a picture and show us your feet!

When I'm home, I wear NOTHING on my feet. I'm a barefoot girl at heart.

The Wonderhubby isn't so barefoot'ish, but we posed together for a post-pedi portrait that I am rather fond of.

Now go see what others wear on their feet around the house! Happy Fun Monday, everyone!

Weekly Winners: February 8-14

We continue our excursion through the Magic Kingdom this week. First stop: the Disney Animal Kingdom park.

Giraffe masquerading as an ostrich:


Up close and personal with a bird:


Begging duck:

Stupid thing was looking for a handout. Sorry, dude. All the fries belonged to us.

Lego dragon:

Downtown Disney

Yep, it IS totally made out of Legos:


Elephant with a stiffie:

I laughed myself sick when we walked by this guy.
I guess I should have shot him from a more flattering angle. Or not ...

Rockers with bagpipes:

At Epcot. This one is totally for Siobhan!

Don't throw the baby out with the bath water:

At Disney's Hollywood Studios

Balloons!!!!!



Thanks, Mom! I LOVE when you take my picture!

At the airport in Orlando, waiting to check in for our flight.
She loves me. You can tell, right?
On the other hand, if you walk around an airport
with your face painted, you're BEGGING to get your picture taken
and you should be required to freakin' smile!!!!

At last, the mom appears in a photo:

I'm not really that much taller than she is ... but at least she smiled this time!

Go --->here<--- for more weekly winners.

Memories ...

First ... thank you all for your happy dance for me yesterday. I am one happy happy camper. More to come -- eventually.

And second?

Nothing says Valentine's Day like a story about teenage girls and their periods.

At Mid-Century Modern Moms today, we recall a story of Aunt Flo's non-appearance at our house.

Haiku Friday: the new challenges ahead edition

Something has happened.
I feel like a new woman ...
Cuz I quit my job!!!

It's time for a fresh
start -- a chance to make my life
less stressful again.

Some of you know all
of the facts of the story.
Of you, I ask this:

Please keep what comes next
for me out of the comments.
I have my reasons.

Legalities make
that request necessary!
You understand, yes?

Although please feel free
to do a happy dance for
my escape from hell!

Wait. Was I really on vacation????

Memorable moments from four (five? It's all a blur) in the Sunshine State:

Private parts

What the heck is the deal with the toilet paper at a Disney resort hotel? It was like SANDPAPER! Wonderhubby, in complete seriousness, said, "Next year, we're bringing our own!" Feel sorry for my poor parts, people. It was not pretty.

Huh?????

My father-in-law (a Floridian) drove for the competition, stayed in our room, left early Sunday morning ... and left his hearing aids on our bathroom counter.

We tried to call him but his phone was off. When he DID call, this is the Wonderhubby side of the conversation, which took place on a bus en route to Disney's Animal Kingdom:

"You left your hearing aids on the counter."

*pause*

"YOU LEFT YOUR HEARING AIDS ON THE COUNTER."

*pause*

"YES, I KNOW YOU CAN'T HEAR ME -- THAT'S BECAUSE YOU LEFT YOUR HEARING AIDS ON THE COUNTER!"

Sigh.

The grass is always greener -- and so is my face!

The Mount Everest ride ... uh ... goes backwards. I don't do backwards roller coasters. Yuck.

Speaking of green ...

I believe that the entire state of Florida was vomiting at some point during our trip. I swear that everywhere we went, someone puked.

* On our walk to the entrance of the Magic Kingdom, I had to yank Wonderhubby to the left before he walked through a pile o' puke on the pavement. A quick glance to the right gave us a perfect view of a poor youngster still heaving, surrounded by concerned parents.

* On our ride on the monorail, as we approached one stop, I heard a weird rushing-water sound.

More than once.

A quick glance to the left gave us a perfect view from an older gentlemen vomiting on the floor.

We changed cars.

* As we waited to check our luggage on the flight home, we saw a mother bolt from out of the line with a toddler. A quick glance to our left gave us a perfect view of the toddler ralphing into a blanket.

Just for the record, apparently they boarded our plane anyway. One of the moms in our party (who sat in front of them) told us later that the kid puked every half-hour or so for the entire nearly 6-hour flight.

No lie.

And then there was early-morning humor

Evil Wife: I don't want to get up.

Wonderhubby: Then don't.

Evil Wife: Yeah, but I have to pee, and that could be SOOO messy.

Wonderhubby: We DO have another bed ...

*rimshot*

Can I just say that I'm glad I'm home?

Sometimes it's Mommy who grows up

It's funny what you think of while you're on vacation.

Especially when you're at a kid-centric place like the Happiest Place on Earth.

(Continued at Mid-Century Modern Moms)

Weekly Winners: February 1-6

This has been an odd sort of week -- in an interesting sort of way.

I'm actually posting away from home today, from cheer nationals in Orlando, which takes us to ... Mickey's house!

No cheer pictures yet, if at all -- it hasn't been a stellar weekend for the girls, but lots of fun for Wonderhubby and me in the house that Walt built.

First he sang with the Dapper Dans ...

"My Wild Irish Rose"

And then I did:

"Coney Island Baby"

Don't go into the light!!!!!!

I can't help it ... it's so beautiful!

The Wild Wild West at Big Thunder Mountain:


Mickey's mug was everywhere:


Hey, suckah ...


He's got the whole world in his hands ...

Epcot

The grand finale -- Mickey and Minnie themselves:

Th-th-th-th-that's all, folks! Go --->here<--- for more weekly winners.

A close shave on the razor's edge

We were at the grocery store, stocking up on the appropriate chips and salsas for Super Bowl snacking.

I took a slight detour by way of the cosmetics aisle. Miss Roo and I were sorely short of some vital equipment for our beauty routines (cotton balls), and I figured I'd kill two birds with one stone.

As Wonderhubby and I rolled the cart down the aisle, he stopped at the razors.

"I can't believe the refills for the Mach 3 are $18 for three," he groused. "Three will last me forever."

(Please note: the man has a full beard and only needs razors for trimming around the facial edges.)

"There are disposable Mach 3s here," I pointed out helpfully.

"If I were going to buy disposables, I'd buy these," he said, picking up the cheapy Bic disposables. (He is nothing but consistent in his cheapness frugalness.)

I rolled my eyes and poked around the razors.

"I need some for me, and I like the curvy kind," I said, picking up some pink ones in a more feminine package.

"Well, then, let's just get the ones you like," said Wonderhubby, taking them out of my hand and throwing them in the cart.

"Uh ... sure. You want the purple one instead?"

"Pfffft. I don't care what color it is," he laughed.

That's my guy. Willing to shave with a pink razor.

And, as I have long known, totally comfortable in his masculinity.

Together Wii two

On Monday, I wrote about a special memory I have with Drummer Man.

There was a reason that this popped up to the front of my memory banks and poured out of my fingertips.

We got a Wii Fit this past week. I had a specific reason for wanting -- nay, lusting after -- one of these hard-to-find babies. With my job situation so precarious (a topic for another day), I was thinking that I could give up my gym membership ($$) and just rock the fitness at home.

Maybe that will come to pass. But there was a bonus benefit to bringing this bit of plastic and flashing lights into my living room.

On Saturday night, Wonderhubby went to a sports bar to watch some pay-per-view thing between two guys trying to beat the crap out of each other. I took a pass on the privilege of accompanying him.

Which left me home on a Saturday night with the Roo-girl as my companion.

We ran out to pick up Mexican food (which, by the way, I generally dislike, so this was the ultimate sacrifice for mother-daughter togetherness).

And then we broke out the balance board.

I went first, setting up my file and finding out that Mr. Wii thinks I'm overweight and two years older than I really am. (Bastard!)

Then it was Roo's turn. Miss 14-And-A-Totally-Cut-And-Toned-Cheerleader is, of course, the "perfect" weight.

And her Wii Fit age is ...

Wait for it ...

Are you ready?

TWENTY-FIVE!

There was much screaming and hysterical laughter.

We went on to play ... uh ... I mean exercise for an hour between us. I rocked at hula-hoop and yoga breathing; she beat me at ski jumping.

(There is nothing more humiliating that watching your virtual self tumbling down a mountainside in a virtual snowball because you don't EXTEND YOUR LEGS soon enough. WhatEVER.)

We were crying with laughter by the time we were done. (Did you know that in the soccer game, the other people throw SHOES at your head? Ouch!)

"We have to do this EVERY DAY," Roo crowed when we had had enough. "Together!"

Yep, we do.

And the winner is ...

Ok, no one ever accused me of not overthinking.

So I stressed about people who were entitled to more than one entry and yet had only left one comment with that info. How do I do that???

Do I give up the Mr. Random Number Generator idea and go for the old "pull the name out of a hat" thing? And if I do that, do I need to video the process so you guys don't think it was rigged??

Or ... do I add the extra entries right after the original comment, therefore changing the numerical order of things?

Or ...

Well, you get the idea. Wonderhubby just looked at me with raised eyebrows and told me I should get a grip.

But I wanted to be fair, so here's how I did it. (And if you aren't happy with my methods, um, well ... uh ... too bad. I runs the place, I makes the rules.)

I left the order of comments alone. If you were entitled to more than one entry but didn't leave more than one comment, I added you to the bottom of the list, in order that the comments were left.

This made a total of 93 comments. And when I gave Mr. Random a little goose, here is what he said:


Commenter No. 8 is Just My Life.

Congratulations, honey. Please email me your snail mail address asap, so that Eden Fantasys can ship out your new best friend!

The legend continues

There is a story that is legendary in our house. It is a tale of video games and togetherness from when Drummer Man was small.

The world of Nintendo was new then. It was basic and unsophisticated by today's standards. My boy was 6 when we entered the world of Super Mario and Princess Toadstool.

(Continued at Mid-Century Modern Moms)

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

And ... The winner of the great giveaway will be announced ... TOMORROW.

Come back then and see whose dream will come true.

Weekly Winners: January 25-31

Before we get to my Weekly Winners for this week, I just want to remind you that my very special giveaway closes at 11:59 p.m. tonight. Have you entered? Go! Do it! My photos will be here when you get back ...

Ok, moving on ...

This week, the Roo-girl and I took a little trip to a local shopping center, which has a little park. I had been planning for DAYS to shoot the absolutely gorgeous roses that were blooming there, and we finally got a chance to go.

With camera in hand, and great anticipation, I rounded the corner to find ...

They had pruned the roses back to their nubs. So no flowers for me this week.

Therefore I had to take a different direction. And here's that direction:

Lantern:


TALL fountain:



Deep in thought:


After that, I apparently got all black-and-white and sepia'ish. I didn't realize how many of my photos I had sucked the color out of until I uploaded them all and started captioning them. Heh.

Teenage girl piggies:

This one is for Lotus. This is what happens when baby toes grow up, hon!

I think, therefore I am:


Remembering when my children small:

Just to clarify: That is NOT an old picture of any of my children.
It is a stray (and suitably unidentifiable) child at the park, photographed this week.

Abandoned:

... I have put away childish things.

Go --->here<--- for more weekly winners ... and go -->here<-- to enter my giveaway. Quick! What are you waiting for? It ends tonight!