Wednesday, February 3, 2010

We're at the hotel motel Holiday Inn ...

If you have children, you know that finding time to be ... ahem ... intimate can be challenging.

When they are babies, you're too exhausted to even THINK about it, much less DO it.

When they are older, you have to wait until they're all tucked in before sneaking in some "us" time.

And even then, unless you remembered to lock the door ...

Well, let's just say that I have been known to find a sleeping toddler curled up at the foot of the marital bed.

And been rudely interrupted by an older child making an announcement of impending vomit.

Lovely.

When the children are teens or twentysomethings, you still aren't safe -- because then, they make snide remarks about what they "heard" or didn't want to hear, so really, Mom, could you guys not do that ever again????

Ha. I may be old, but I'm not dead.

Anyway, since the old homestead is a place lined with landmines when it comes to finding the time and privacy to do what comes naturally, I have learned to love -- and idolize -- a rare treat.

Hotel sex.

Admit it. There is nothing sexier than slipping between the sheets at the Ramada ... knowing that you are really truly a.l.o.n.e!

I love love love hotel sex.

No one cares if you make noise.

No one cares if you hang from the chandelier.

No one cares if you walk around in the all-together.

And no one will knock on the door because she needs an ibuprofen and can't find the bottle.

10 comments:

Jenni said...

A hotel is nice, but there's no place like home. This is why we farm the kids out for "date night". We make sure they are safely spending the night at someone else's house and that we have the *whole* house to ourselves. I'm sure it's a little harder to do when they are older, and our oldest once made the mistake of coming home and finding out that we don't always go *out* for our dates. Once. That's all it took and now they all know that you do *not* come home during date night. Ever. We still play the game though. They ask, "So...where are you going for your date." We answer, "Eh, we were thinking about dinner and a movie." They know not to press too much for movie reviews the next day, too.

Joyce-Anne said...

Man, being caught is my biggest fear. My oldest is 8 now.

Suzanne said...

Rock ON!

I have to ask, what is it that they'll never come to your door, but even if you barely make a sound in engaging that lock, when they're sleeping, and they're knocking?

Karen said...

There is a reason that Sam and I stopped getting each other Christmas gifts, and instead get a swanky hotel on Priceline for a weekend in January.

Kaytabug said...

I can't decide which I like more, your post or Jenni's comment!!!

My biggest fear is being walked in on and it has happened twice. Thankfully those times they were young enough not to have a clue and it looked as though we were hugging.

Huckdoll said...

With four year olds we haven't reached the being interrupted stage yet so it's still smooth sailing over here.

I am absolutely DREADING when that changes! Won't that just suck the romance out of things.

Siobhan said...

"Mom, why is daddy's legs all the way over here?" "He's stretching." One day, the oldest won't believe me.

Jenni's comment was tops!

Burgh Baby said...

Jenni wins.

HalfAsstic.com said...

Oh, God yes! I wrote a post on one of my most prized acquisitions: A Do Not Disturb sign from a hotel in Hawaii that a friend of mine brought back for me when I told her that she and I were going to go steal one from the local motel for me to use. She was afeared. And she should have been! There's probably a stiff fine for that!
Hum. Who knows what they do to you in Hawaii!
I think that first sentence is the longest one ever written.

HalfAsstic.com said...

THE SECOND SENTENCE!

 
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